Wednesday, February 20, 2008


Reaching out through tragedy
by Marlo Benning

One of her childhood friends killed her daughter, another friend shook her baby boy so violently it caused irreversible damage to his brain.
For anyone these tragedies would be difficult to handle, even more difficult to tell others about and nearly unthinkable to be able to forgive those that have hurt their family. But that is what Renae Groskreutz has done. She has accepted that her daughter is gone, stood by her son through his challenges and forgiven the friends that dealt her life this hand.
She has chosen to share her story with others to, hopefully, make a lasting impression on them.
She spoke to 7th through 12th grade students at Bertha-Hewitt School last week, reliving her heartwrenching tale as she told them about these tragedies that have occurred in her family's life.
She told of how her best friend began smoking, drinking and doing drugs in high school as she watched him turn from an intelligent boy with a lot of potential to one that wasn't sure if his diploma would be signed on graduation day.
And how many years later his drinking addiction led to an unfortunate truck/motorcycle accident that killed her eldest daughter and critically injured her husband.
She told of how another good friend who was her daycare provider shook her son when he was four months old to stop him from crying. Her son was a victim of Shaken Baby Syndrome. He is doing well, but has many challenges as a result of being shaken.
Impacting those around you
Groskreutz stressed to the students that everything they do impacts someone in one way or another. She encouraged them to aim high and set their expectations up with the eagles, not on the ground with the chickens.
Her story spoke for itself in the aspect of drug and alcohol abuse and what can happen as a result. It told how making bad choices can not only affect yourself, but others as well.
She encouraged them to keep their virginity sacred, to always tell the truth and to expect a lot in life.
She reminded them that no matter what has happened to them in life that "someone loves you".
How is your dash?
Groskreutz said that she wishes her daughter's headstone read differently than it does. She wishes it would have shown a very large dash between her date of birth and that of her death. Why? Because that's where the important things happen-In life.
So, she asked, "How is your dash?" to the Verndale and Bertha-Hewitt students that listened to her hour long speech.
"If yours needs help, get it. If you have a friend whose dash isn't doing so good, help them to get help."
marlo@inhnews.com

For more information concerning Renae Groskreutz, visit her website at renaespeaks.org