Grumpy Old Ganz

The Hatchet Part 2

If you read my editorial last week, you know that it wasn’t until my teenage years that I found out the truth about the “hatchet” and chopping down the old oak tree. Actually, at that point in my life, I acquired a “real” hatchet and it became a very useful tool for me.

As I grew older I started to find a variety of uses for my hatchet.

When I started hunting big game I had a host of items I needed to bring along with me including a knife, saw, hatchet, etc.

This is when I realized my hatchet was a one tool wonder and that’s all I needed to carry along with my rope and flashlight.

Not long ago I hit a deer. Doing everything legally, I brought this monstrosity home in the trunk of my car.

Knowing right where my hatchet was I grabbed it and returned to the deer to begin the task of skinning it. The person helping me asked, “What are you gonna do with that?” (referring to my hatchet).

Without hesitation, I smirked and said, “I’m gonna kill it again”.

Instantly, there were camera clicks coming from a cell phone and the “swoosh” sound of pictures being sent as I began.

It didn’t take me long to clean the deer by the trunk light. I skinned and quartered it and then planned to finish the rest the following day.

Soon my phone was bogged down with a myriad of sarcastic comments and pictures of the bloodied hatchet which looked like it had come straight out of a horror movie. I received several texts asking “who made you mad this time?” and “what did you kill with that?” and “is it even legal to use that?” It sounded as though I was some sort of a savage.

No, one tool wonder, my hatchet, has come in very handy on many occasions in my lifetime and cleaning and cutting up the deer was just one of those times.

I will leave you with this food for thought: You can’t blame the hatchet for the noise made by the chicken about to be slaughtered.


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